Tuesday, August 26, 2008

When you are getting older…


2 months back, me and my friend was sitting at the bar listening to live band performance after an expensive dinner. There was an old white man sitting opposite us, keep starring at us. After finished the first glass of white wine, the old man ordered the bar tender to get us another 2 glasses of wine. Out of courtesy, I think we should actually thank him for that. Then we started the conversation. He was here for business and he travels to Malaysia once every month for the past 15 years. He is mid-age man with grey hair; he looks a bit like the age of Sean Connery and Jack Nicholson.


Me, the same old me, I don’t mind getting to know more people especially those powerful person like him. After couples of wine, he started to touch me and asking me to spend a night with him. I rejected him in a polite way, because I’m with my friend and this is not my principle. I still remember he was trying hard to persuade me, he used 3 different techniques: -


  1. Begging

At first, he was trying to beg me “Come, please spend a night with me…please… please… you are lovely… you are so pretty… Come please… just one night @ my room”


  1. Lecture

I insisted I don’t feel like going. He started to lecture me, he said “Life is so short, when you feel like doing something, you have to do it now, if not you will regret!”


  1. Sympathy

Then I said, today was not a good day because me with my friend. And he started to gain my sympathy “When the sun rises, things changed! You may not wanna see me anymore or pick up my calls! You promised you will pick up my calls?”


Although I’m a bit high in alcohol, I was thinking “This old man, not bad! He still knows how to use the technique to persuade me to do that!” At the end, nothing happened!


The next day, he did call me. Due to work, I didn’t manage to meet him at all. He called couple of times from overseas and even want to pay me a trip to Thailand when he was on business trip. But nothing have been work out.


After 2 months, finally he is back. I don’t want him to lose interest in me, so I agreed to go out for dinner with him. After couples of white wine, we went for a nice a.k.a. expensive Japanese restaurant for dinner. The whole conversation was nice, he is being a gentleman. After the dinner, he asked what we should do next? Should we continue to drink at the bar or go back to his room? After the wines, I let him decides.


So he holded my hand and brought me to his room, he turned off all the lights until I cannot see my own fingers. He started to kiss and touch.


That moment, I flashed back the 1 episode I watched from Sex & The City, when Samantha met old millionaire, Ed. Ed didn’t have an old man touch or an old man kiss. When he turned on the light, he has an old man ass!!!


So I know why he wanna turned all the lights off. Everything was fine, just that he is too old to be hard. Even touched or blow also can never get hard. On the other hand, he was trying hard to make me happy, he said what he wants was just seeing me happy. After the whole foreplay session (because he was not ready for sex), he just wanted me to rest on his arm and keep saying that he loves me and want me to stay with him tonight. Of course I’m not going to stay with him because I have early appointment tomorrow.


After the long description of the story, here comes the most important part of the story. Before I left his room, he gave me 100 USD. I was so shocked, the first thing came from my mouth is “I’m not a prostitute!” He said “Of course you are not, take the money and buy some nice clothes or buy something you like; I just want you to be happy!”


Did I take the money? Of course, I did!


I didn’t do anything, no sex happened, he gave me “Ang Pow”. What in my mind was “It was a good trade! He was the one doing all the hard work and now I have money!” So may be what he wants is a just a companionship, may be making a young girl happy can help him to build his confidence level. He sounded horny all the time when we talked on the phone; in fact he is too old for that. Sometimes, I’m worried whether he will die on bed because he is too sexcited!


When a man getting older and they are rich, what they actually want is just to rebuild their confidence? I wonder (after I took the money, of course)…

Monday, August 11, 2008

Friendship VS. Sex-ship


I always believe that men & women are totally different set of creature. From the physical, the god differentiates us well. Mentally, women are more emotional, sentimental and sophisticated; men are straight forward, rational and they have the quality that women don’t have is – they can separate sex & emotions. Some people said that men are able to separate all the eggs in different baskets, while women put all the eggs in a basket, if one doesn’t go well, it will affect others.

R (a very open minded lady with good career prospect in the company) called me today; she told me she has found a sex partner a month ago from the internet who looks like her ex-boy friend. They didn’t interact much before they go to a hotel in downtown. After meeting a couple of times for sex, R started to have the emotional attached with this guy. She expected his SMS everyday, wondering whether he will text her today, or may be will they meet again anytime soon. However she realized that she is the only one felling that way. Because from the man point of view, she is merely his sex partner not she is even a friend. The worst thing is he doesn’t really know what her real name is; he only knows her nick name.


I remembered M told me her experience before. She has a net friend from overseas spending his trip in Malaysia. Due to Malaysian hospitality, she thought that she may bring him for sight seeing and giving him some traveling advices. So she picked him up from the airport and sent him to the hotel. This guy was very good looking and she had no problem having sex with him if the mood was OK. According to M, the whole meeting was not bad, so the sex did happen. Before she left the hotel, they were actually planned to meet again the next day after she finished work. The next morning, M got the message from this guy, the message was saying that he cannot see her anymore, because seeing her was just out of gratitude and it was not fair to her (which I think is bullshit), so he decided to travel alone. What really hurt was, he mentioned that there was no physical attraction after seeing her; he didn’t feel like hugging her. M was very upset, he came twice during the sex and now he told her that she didn’t appeal to him. The sex part was not purposely arranged by her. The major intention meeting up with this guy was all because of “friendship” that she thought they have. You don’t reject a friend because she doesn’t appeal to you, do you?

From a male friend, his name is K. He said he loves women so much therefore he cannot afford to settle down with a woman. He told me the reason why he need to change his sex partner, because when he spends more time with a girl, she will request more and more after that. So when the girl requests more, he will cut her off from his life. He told me, girls will always ask for more and she will start to look for more commitment from a man after sleeping with him. Women always want to get more focus and they tend to get jealous, then the man started to get questions and problems after that. All of these “qualities” of women “force” him to change his partner every season. Obviously, I do not see any “friendship” in him and his sex partner. Everything he planned or did is merely for great sex, like wonderful dinner, nice wine, good movie, etc.

Sometimes, I realized that women are looking for a soul mate or so called “friend” instead of just sex partner. This guy is not necessary have to be her boy friend or husband, just someone they can talk and share life; of course they also could fulfill their sexual desire once in a while.

But for men, they do not need a soul mate; they just need a sex partner. They can just f*** without any talking or communication.

The intention of a man and woman is different here. For a woman, friendship always comes first; for men, sex-ship comes first. Without sex, women can still be friend with the man (unless he is very annoying in person). For some men, no sex = no talk. They talk to you when they want sex.

I believe men are rational when they are dealing with their sex partner. If you are the sex partner category, you will forever in it. You will not be able to switch your role to the potential girl friends category or even the “friends” category. For women, sex partner can be potential boy friend or best friend. Because women will not simply sleep with any guys they picked up on the street. She has to like him in a way.

I agree that women are more emotional driven, men are more sexually driven. Men know how to separate sex & emotions; sometimes I really amaze how men actually can do that…

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Love 2008

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

女人给男人的 忠告!

1 别以为女人是你肚子里面的蛔虫,你爱不爱她,你什么也不说,你什么也不做,她怎么会知道?
 
2.别在女人撒娇的时候冷落她,否则她可能会认为她在你心里已经不重要了。
 
3.性关系对女人来说,远远没有男人想得那么重要,所以,不要以为她爱你,就该在你需要的时候,无条件地满足你,那样她只能认为你只在乎性,而不是她。
 
4.在她穿上新衣服的时候,适当地赞扬她一下,别总说这个太暴露、那个太透明;即使真的如此,你可以跟她说:?这件衣服你穿着真漂亮,但只能穿给我看!?她会明白的。
 
5.别动不动跟她说:?你懂什么?我的事你别管!?女人也有自尊,即使在她最爱的男人面前,她依然有自尊。
 
6.在她独处的时候,给她自由,别说她今天很奇怪;她静默的时候,给她拥抱,别问她为什么。
 
7.她一定会有异性朋友,甚至会是知心朋友,别担心,女人对爱情和友谊,往往比男人分得清楚。
 
8.吃醋是女人的专利,如果女人有天不吃你的醋了,那只可能是她不爱你了;但醋吃多了,女人会伤心,依然会离开她爱的你。
 
9.女人对于爱情的需要和男人对于性的需要一样多,所以不要指责她对爱情的追求是?奢侈?。
 
10.能容忍自己的男人去偷吃的女人,永远是少数,不要期待你的女人是少数派;即便她真的是,那她可能也找到了平衡心态的方式:也去偷吃。
 
11.记住:这个世界的男女比例是 1.04 1,女人永远比男人少,而且,每个男人都想拥有几个女人。结论是:女人永远比男人有性别优势!

Saturday, August 2, 2008

先處理心情、再處理事情


我們必須學習
『情緒忍受力』和『挫折容忍力』
因為,
『脾氣來了,福氣就沒有了』
在我們碰到棘手的問題時,必須先靜下來、勿衝動行事 也學習
『 先處理心情、再處理事情』
免得事情愈弄愈糟糕 有句話說:
『生命的長度是上帝所給予的,但生命的寬度卻掌握在我們自己的手中』
的確,我們雖然不能控制生命的
『長度』
但我們可以控制生命的
『寬度』

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